I have Confidence in Sunshine but that's about it.

This probably won't come as a surprise but, I have issues with my confidence.  I often find myself wishing that I looked like someone else, acted like someone else, or even had someone else's confidence.  I know I am not alone and that there are hundreds of people that feel the same way I do.

So much energy is put into telling people to love themselves, be themselves and that everyone is beautiful but all that effort can't compete with the alternative messages that people need fixing.

Now there are certain situations when I do have confidence.  When I stand in front of a classroom, I know I am the boss.  I can teach students all about theatre and have no issues feeling like I belong up there.  When I am lecturing, I own the classroom.

The big question for me is why the confidence I have in the classroom can't roll over into my everyday life.  Why is it that when walking down the street I don't feel like I own the street? Why is it when I read a magazine I can't just read the magazine? Why is it that I compare myself to the images of the women and then place a value judgement on both myself and the women in the pictures?  I am sure that these are all questions many women and men have asked themselves and are still looking for answers to.

As some of you may know, I have tried to lose weight in the past saying that it I wanted to be healthier, when really I just wanted to be skinnier.  Being healthy is important but waking up everyday and stepping on the scale is not healthy behavior.  I want to be healthy but I also want to really love myself before I change myself.  I want to eat a piece of cake and not worry that it isn't a piece of celery.  I want to exude confidence, eat cake and be healthy.

Maybe writing this post and reading things like this will help.